Open Letter to a Bitch

Dear Biatch,


You come here every week and every time you arrive looking like you just stepped in a big... steaming...sweaty....pile. You toss credit cards, ignore friendly overtures, and refuse complimentary wine with the same disdain as if we were trying to sell it to you. All the while bitching about some bitch "go figure" at work who you are so close to telling off because "who does she think she is?"

I just want to know, is your life just a miserable smoldering wreckage? Is it really so awful that you just can't summon up the will to pretend that you like anything?

I mean I get it. Some days I wake up and I'm just so pissed off that I have to go to work and deal with people that are intensely ungrateful, snarky and well people just like you actually. The difference is I don't inflict my bitchiness on you, I may not be your best friend, but I don't roll my eyes and sigh at your every comment. So do me a freaking favor, Take the frigging wine, heck take the whole stinking bottle when its offered, drink up and release the inner raver.

I bet you are one of those people who gets a little tipsy and just lovvvvves everyone and tells people that they are like soooo awesome, and that you want to be friends for like ever. While dancing around like its the love parade in Germany, and you just can't seem to keep your clothes.

Whatever it takes, I don't care just do it. I'm tired of people like you making my life a living hell.

P.S. If you are ever in town again and decide you need to get some. I know a guy, another guest actually, just like you. He may or may not be a woman beater, and may or may not be gay; minor points, almost irrelevant really. Let me know I'll set up a meeting. Kthanxbye.

The longest Story ever Told

It seems as though any thought or aggravation I have had recently, has been completely overwhelmed by worry and stress related to my homelessness and hopelessness associated with the never ending school and work schedule. I literally have been unable to form coherent thought much less sentences. But, yesterday, as I once again prepared for my planning session with my Advisor and whipped out my degree plan to see how far I have left I realized that I will graduate next May! Yeahhh!!! Everyone keeps reminding me that it's like a year away. Thanks Downy McDowners I know, I get it, but the fact is its going to happen, and I have a date.

You see I've been in school FOR-EV-ER, which is ironic since I graduated High School early. However life called and so did my reservations about what it was I was meant to do with it. I remember trying to plan to go away to college and feeling as though the earth was being taken off axis. It just felt wrong. The thought of being away from my family would cause me to burst spontaneously into tears and usually resulted in a full grown panic attack. I didn't sleep for weeks the last semester of high school. I just couldn't do it. I couldn't plan anything beyond getting my diploma. So I graduated and went off to community college the same one my brother and sister went to when we first moved from Jamaica. It was a happy time and place, my family as always was well known and had made a name for themselves within the academic community in Dallas, and my sister was the president of the college. It felt right, but as time wore on and as I dabbled in class after class I still couldn't commit to anything. Somehow time escaped and I ended up with tons of class credit but obviously no cohesive connection for a degree.

A wise friend suggested that I take Journalism or Communications since I loved to write and that it was easily applied to many career paths. Ah finally no need to make a firm decision. It was the perfect suggestion. I applied to only two four year Universities. The public one because it was cheap and the private University because it was close to home; which I realize now is ridiculous since the private Uni is practically Ivy League but that was my reason. I got accepted to the "one close to home" and discovered far more than I expected. Within months I had a clear vision of what I wanted to do, that litterally eased any fear and also my previous plans. God does work in mysterious ways. In that time I have grown as a woman and have finally fully developed my wings and I'm ready to fly.

Now almost a year later, I'm just a year away from the completion of my degree. It's crazy I have never had a date before something to look forward to. For the longest time I've told everyone who asked that I was about a year and a half away from graduating, I've been a year and a half from graduating for over 3 years. This time its finally true. Its completely changed my perspective on everything even on the most annoying Job in the world. I think I almost hugged every person that walked through the front doors of my hotel last night. As it turns out it much easier to deal with people's crap when you know it'll all be over soon. That's not to say I don't and won't occasionally still want to punch people in the face, just means It'll be easier to swallow the impulse.

Even with the Job market looking as crappily as it does I'm really not that worried. I'll just be happy to finally be able to make my way in the world. I can't wait for someone to ask me again when I'm graduating I'll be glad to tell them next May, and this time I'm absolutely sure.